This week I was able to do something I’ve never done before. I witnessed a marriage. I have been an attendant in a few weddings, but I’ve never been the “maid of honor” so it hasn’t been my signature on that important line. But this past Wednesday I was honored to scrawl my rather untidy signature next to “Second Witness”. And the best part of the whole experience was the level of happiness in the room. Continue reading
After having Oldest, I realized pregnancy and labor & delivery had changed my body in many ways, but one change I neither counted on nor initially realized was that I developed post-partum depression (PPD). I was 32, happily married, the mother of a beautiful baby boy, and miserable. But I did what I often think I do best…I buffaloed my way through the dark days and survived. And for the most part things were moderately good and then got better.
Then I had a miscarriage. And the darkness that I attributed to losing that baby came and just never left. When Middlest arrived 13 months later, I had gained not only more stretch marks and grey hairs, but the ability to recognize just how dark my emotional place was. Within two weeks of her birth I was on Zoloft and I started to inch my way towards a brighter place.
For the history buffs out there, you already know that the Bronze Age refers to the era situated between the Stone Age and the Iron Age. It varies in its place along the human timeline depending on which culture is being studied. For some cultures, the Bronze Age began as early as over 3000 BC while others didn’t get there until closer to 1300 BC. In a nutshell, the Bronze Age describes the middle years of humanity’s ability to manipulate its world…more advanced than banging rocks but not yet able to smelt ore. It was a time of great growth and potential for humanity as all areas of human existence evolved right along with our ability to forge metals. It was the time when humanity advanced meteorically but in hindsight was nowhere near reaching its full potential. The strength and shine of the metals it used mimics humanity’s own strength and ability to shine.
Therefore, in some ways, it makes sense to describe the 19th wedding anniversary as the Bronze Anniversary. After 19 years, a relationship has come so very far in its evolution. But the evolutionary periods of that relationship are still unknown; it is still a work in progress.
I’ve told a joke before that always gets the laughs and always gets people coming up after the show to talk about it. It goes like this: “Ladies, let me tell you a little secret. Men may like perfect women’s bodies, but that’s not what they’re attracted to. Men are attracted to what they have access to. Sexy is all about proximity.” And folks laugh because it’s true.
But that which is funny is often built upon what makes us twitch a bit. And the fact of the matter is most of us are very uncomfortable with our bodies and what makes us feel sexy and all that. I think the solution is putting the parts together and getting naked. And I’m happy to explain.
Have you ever noticed that human propensity to mind other’s business? Very interesting and I’m sure a hold-over from a more cave-like-existence when it probably came in handy…both to keep your neighbor safe as well as to get first dibs on his stuff when he met with his demise. And really, we haven’t evolved much since then aside from argyle socks. Case in point, folks love to comment on gifts given and received. (And a whole bunch more stuff, but I’ll limit myself because I have a long list of things to get done today.)
Ya’ll remember that song? There are some situations that just lend themselves to country music, don’t you think? However, in my case, my dating experiences aren’t one of them. Mostly because my radio dial just can’t go certain places and I couldn’t finish a beer without gagging if you paid me. Yep, in my world, “exes” just can never be the thing of beer and country western music, although I understand the certain appeal of such connections.
However, when thinking of my exes, I thought I’d give a brief moment of homage to George Strait. Not much time, but a bit. In fact, for all you George fans, here’s a little look-see at the man. Hmm, so that’s the face behind the crooning voice. Okay, so I figured on the cowboy hat – it is a crap-shoot over whether it will be black or white. Requisite western shirt, big smile, looks like the kind of guy who’d sing about ex-girlfriends needing to be a few states away.
And in fact, that’s a good place for most exes – unless you are sharing custody of kids or critters, and then those long drives get to be a pain. Some things are better not visited often, yes?
Lately, there have been people in my life struggling with the cessation of their relationships. And, of course, since I’ve got kiddos, we got to have family conversations about the big “d” word and what that all means for grown-ups and kiddos alike. They looked relieved when their dad and I assured them that we were “solid” and that our family would stay as they were accustomed to having it be.
And yet, I am getting just a wee taste of solo-parenting as today is day one of a short work-related trip my husband is taking out in Chicago. As we were tucking the little people into bed last night, our youngest sobbed, “I miss Daddy already” about 2 seconds after my husband left the room. Broke my heart. And made me thankful again that I have such a great man in my life to be both father and daddy to my children.
So far, the only silver lining has been being able to eat garlic at lunch with no guilt. 🙂
Have you ever had one of those moments when you are caught unawares and then bluster about so much so as to make folks wonder what the heck is wrong with you? Yeah, I have those moments on a near daily basis. And nothing brings it on like a trip to the grocery store.