Things Are Puzzling

IMG_0288I try to get Mister Soandso or my family a puzzle every year at Christmas. For some reason, this feels like a good tradition to continue as both he and I grew up in families that completed jigsaw puzzles over the holidays. This year was no different. Christmas morning  Mister Soandso unwrapped his puzzle and then set it aside. Several days later, it made its way to our coffee table and we started working on it.1000 pieces of various types of candy. It seemed like a pretty sweet deal. Me, the kids, and Mister all puzzling away with cups of cocoa and Christmas musical in the background. Continue reading

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Everything Is Silent

Last week I developed laryngitis. In my world, laryngitis is a seasonal thing I know will show up at least a few times every year. Normally I don’t mind it terribly because I’m not a big fan of my voice, it being rather stupid sounding and all. So having a different sounding voice is always a bit like a nice change as far as I’m concerned.

But this was not that sort of laryngitis. This was the sort that instead of making me sound Lauren Bacall-esque, it made me sound silent. As in I lost my whole voice. And, of course, I was scheduled to be talking on Sunday. Continue reading

Groot And The Family Dud

You know how they say opposites attract? Well, Mister Soandso and I knew from our first Halloween together that we were opposites. He’s a Halloween sort of guy and I’m pretty much a Halloween dud. He got dry ice and black lighting to spookify our front porch. I bought candy. And then consoled him which chocolate when we got 1 Trick or Treater.

I know I’ve written about that before but this past weekend served to remind me how much of a dud I am when it comes to my family. I’m not really the dud of my family. Not in the bad pancake sort of way. Much. But I’m not as much fun as everyone else, so in that way, I am pretty dudly. Most times I don’t mind being the dud, but sometimes life reminds you of your shortcomings and life has a bit more sting than usual. Continue reading

Truth and Risks

I am not a risk taker. This is my truth. I have tried to be a risk-taker on a few occasions and they always landed on the side of “less than awesome” and more than once it was a god-awful experience.

That is not to say that I haven’t engaged in some terribly risky behavior. But there is a difference between doing something stupid and impetuous and taking a calculated risk. Stupid, I can do. Calculated is apparently not so much of my forté.

Of course, I was better at being calculated and risk-taking back in the days when I didn’t care if I walked the tightrope of life without a net. But now I’m not alone in this venture and I worry about how my actions will impact folks I love. Continue reading

Take A Leap

Do you remember the first time you played leap frog? I’m betting you were you a kid, still being measured more in terms of months and star stickers than in pounds and inches or tax brackets and degrees. I don’t actually remember my first time. But I know there must have been one.

I hope I was laughing for that first time. Hell knows I haven’t always laughed for all the other first times in my life. My first flat tire, my first “C”, my first cavity, my first tax return, my first delivery, my first gray hair, and so on.

You sure pile up a mess of firsts while living life. Continue reading

I Will Wish As A Mother

My middle child is home sick today. This is the child who tries to negotiate with illness so that she doesn’t miss school. The child who once came down with scarlet fever while we were on vacation…who knows how long she was actually sick before she finally succumbed. She is not and never has been one to appreciate much attention while she’s sick. Just leave her alone and let her sleep.

Which is something I can fully support seeing as that’s how I like to deal with illness. Just leave me alone and let me sleep.

But today, more than anything I want to ignore her wishes. Instead, I wish I could scoop her up in my arms and hold her close. To sit so long and so very still that I can actually feel her heart beating, feel that subtle shake a body makes when it is still of everything beside a tiny breath and a steady heart beat. Continue reading

Being Better

This past week has had 2 of my kids sick with colds and 1 kiddo feeling stiff and sore from running. I’m happy to report that all three are feeling better.

I’m doing better too. I think. I definitely don’t feel quite as madly whirling about the place like a gyroscope that’s lost its bearing. So I guess I am better.

Better – a word of comparison. I’m better than her or him or an earlier version of myself. Continue reading