“I’ll Take Three Dildos and a Scanner”

Alright, I admit that is a bit of a sensational headline, but it will make sense.  I promise.

My husband and I have an absurd collection of on-line sources for news and information.  Of course, my bookmarks are limited to news sources such as The BBC, MSNBC, and The Huffington Post.   You know, “normal” places to keep up with the state of the world and such things.  My husband has all kinds of computer-geek sites as well so he can stay quite up-to-date on the latest gadget he needs to salivate over.  However, we are both fans of Reddit.com and Digg.com.  And last night, apparently someone posted a review of the best sexual aids of 2008 out on Reddit.

Of course, he had to take a look.  And what I hear is, “Hey, look at what you can buy on Amazon these  days.”

Which is a bang-up idea on Amazon’s part, don’t you think?  You are in need of something that you don’t want showing up on your front porch either wrapped in a nondescript brown paper that screams, “Sex Toy!  Sex Toy!” or bearing a return address like “Joe’s Sexual Aids for the Lonely.”  Instead, your UPS carrier just thinks you are ordering more books or some such thing.  

Curiosity piqued, my husband heads over to Amazon for a gander.  And yes, you should see what you can buy on Amazon these days.  Certainly an eyebrow raising experience.  Well, perhaps for some.  

But what did raise our collective eyebrows was that handy feature that Amazon has – I’m sure you may have even utilized it, as I have many times in the past. If you scroll to the bottom of the item description, there is a section that identifies what other shoppers have also purchased.  You know, like if you are a big fan of this book, then this one might be of interest to you as well.  

Here’s what it looked like on the page for the best selling sexual aid for 2008:

Screen Shot  Isn’t this wonderful?  Now, my husband didn’t quite get it right, as it isn’t three dildos and a scanner.  But it is three sexual aids and a scanner.  In case you are my age and cannot quite make out the font, the first is “The Cone Personal Massager,” the second is the  “Pjur Woman Bodyglide Silicone Lubricant,” the third item is the “Lelo Luna Balls Pleasure-Fitness System” (who knew those muscles get their own personal gym these days) and the fourth is the “ScanSnap S510M Instant PDF Sheet Fed Scanner.”

Just how does that happen?  You are feeling like you are in need of some purchases – perhaps for an upcoming bridal shower…one of those “ha ha ha” kinds of things – and suddenly think to yourself, “Hey, while I’m here I should check out their prices on scanners.”

Or did it go the other way?  The scanner dies just as you are in the middle of a project and while on Amazon picking up a new one, you are stricken with the need to look at the latest offerings by Amazon.  

Either way, it gave my husband and I a big ole belly laugh kind of moment last night.

And of course, it explains another news story Reddit ran a few days ago.  It seems that Amazon had a very successful shopping season.  As in it was their most successful year to date.

I can imagine the board meeting.  “Let’s see.  The economy is in the toilet and other merchants are folding left and right.  How can we make it through these turbulent times?” 

“Ah, I have an idea.  We could sell, ah, um, sex toys sir.”